Limits

I have now learned why weight loss is considered to be a journey and not a sprint. It sure does not come easy, and if you are doing it the healthy way, it sure does not come fast. Since beginning my journey, I have lost 20 pounds. I wish I could feel more triumphant about a 20 pound weight loss, but currently I am feeling defeated. I have been working out killing myself at the gym and dieting for about 21 weeks, yet I have only lost 20 pounds. People have assured me that a slow weight loss is a good sign, as it means that it will probably be permanent. Weight that melts off quickly can creep back on just as quickly.

Due to the fact that I have been feeling so defeated lately, my dieting has slipped. I have been binging off and on for about two weeks. I have good days, but I also have days where I swear my stomach is a bottom-less pit and I could literally eat everything in my fridge. And freezer. And pantry. But I have started this week feeling rejuvenated and renewed and I am ready to kick some more ass in the diet department.

The aha moment that I had over the weekend in fact has to do with my diet. As I was eating and drinking my weight on St. Patty's day, I realized that nothing that I eat is off limits. Some people will never eat fast food. Some people only eat sweets once a week, or once a month even! I, however have a very little amount of food that is off limits. I am not one to believe in giving up foods completely or depriving myself, as I am a lover of food (which is what got me to such a high weight in the first place). I have found that I will never be able to completely give up any sort of food group. I have tried giving up sugar and failed. I have tried giving up carbs and failed. And when I started eating the food that I had previously deprived myself from, I began eating it with a vengeance.

With adopting a new healthy eating lifestyle, I had decided that I would never deprive myself, but only indulge in moderation. Going along with moderation I have decided to set limits for myself. Just because a cookie is free does not mean that I need to eat it. If I order a sandwich and it comes with french fries, I do not have to eat the whole plate. And if I do eat a whole plate of french fries, I probably should not have tater tots at dinner time.

My whole journey has been made up of baby steps but today when offered a free doughnut, I declined. That's progress, right?