Beyond Frustrated

I have wrote about hitting a weight plateau before. The first one I hit was here, and the next one was here. I have hit many plateaus but those 2 were the longest, most frustrating plateaus. And I never wanted to hit another one. But such is life, and I have not dropped weight in about 4 weeks. I am ready to starve myself until I feel like fainting and then eat a cube of cheese. Seriously.

December was great. I dropped weight so fast. Like almost 10 pounds. I am sure this correlates with that fact that I drank very infrequently in December. Stupid alcohol keeps me fat. But I am not going to give it up. I love to party. Everything in moderation, right?

I barely remember being in the 180s. I remember being 187lbs but then very quickly I moved to 181, and then 179. Then I wavered between 181 and 179. Then 181 and 178. You get the picture. I am currently at 178lbs. And the scale will not move down.

My weight is just taunting me. I feel like I can hear a voice saying "how bad do you want it, bitch." It always happens when I am excited about hitting a goal. When I just wanted to be out of the 200s, I lingered around 200 for over a month!

Then I wanted to hit 55 pounds gone for my one year weight loss anniversary but I danced around 54 pounds for weeks. This time I just want to hit 70 pounds gone, which will happen when I hit 176lb, 2 more to go.

The most frustrating part is that my eating has been so damn clean. I was tracking all of my points, until about 10 days ago. I wanted to see if I could eat intuitively and possibly shock my system into dropping some lbs. No such luck.

I eat healthy fats in moderation. I eat a protein heavy diet, but not enough to make me bulk. I make sure that I get 25 grams of fiber. I chug water, constantly. I get 7-8 hours of sleep a night. I go hard at the gym, and lift weights 3 times a week. I barely eat out, and when I do I avoid fried foods. I avoid sugar. I eat 3 servings of vegetables and 2 servings of fruit a day.

It now just comes intuitively, I feel like I am living such a healthy lifestyle. Yet my body is not giving me the results that I want. And I feel so chained to WW or counting calories or keeping a food journal.

Now, I know that peole would tell me to give up the drinking. But I have drank throughout my whole weight loss process, so I know it can be done. And I count my drinks in with my WW points!

So, what can I do differently?

I could give up drinking beer. The problem is that beer is a good option for me, it doesn't get me toooo drunk. It just kinda keeps me buzzing.

I could also change up my gym routine, which I plan to do. My favorite instructor is having surgery and will be out for 6 weeks. I am really upset but it will make me change up my work-out routine. By pushing my body out of it's normal comfort zone I am hoping to accomplish more of a calorie burn!

And just to keep myself motivated, I will now reflect on how far that I have come and know how much I am capable of. Ignore how heinous that I look in these photos. I do not look good after getting home from the gym, and I will never understand girls who do:

Left side: April 2012-226 pounds 

Right side: December 2012- 180 pounds